whatever.

whatever. by DinosaurMuffin on Polyvore.com

Description:

To me, ugly wasn’t just my weight, it was just how my weight was distributed. It was my eyebrows being to thick. It was my face having too many zits. My neck too fat, my palms too sweaty. It was my lack of height and my lack of being blonde and my being the only one not in a black dress to my sixth grade graduation. (I wore a blue dress.) My lack of friends, my lack of status and my lack of swearing.
These days it’s my grades being less than perfect and my lack of social life beyond my small circle of friends. It’s my lack of people remembering who I am and my lack of talent, especially in math. It’s all the extra curriculars I’m participating in and lack of money and free time. It’s university. It’s high school. It’s now. It’s trying to keep up with the world. It’s politics. It’s breaking stereotype. It’s what everyone thinks about me and what everyone doesn’t.

But you know what? F it all. “If I want to fly, I’ll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and f the rest.”

You can’t be everyone’s perfect image.

Alex Violet

A Glimpse

This is a video of me (sitting in the lawn chair at the start) and my little brother, Mathew (behind the shed yelling bear noises at the start).
I posted this video on YouTube about July 2008 (the summer before ninth grade, I believe. I was thirteen, Mathew was … nine, I think?).
It was about a year and a half ago, I believe. It feels like it was longer, though.
There’s been a lot that’s happened since then.

I started high school.
I won an art award.
I went through 9 exams.
I went camping at a beautiful provincial park with the student’s council.
I gained like, 10 of some of my best friends in the world at pathfinders.
I got a facebook account.
I got a blog.
I’ve attempted to finish writing several novels.
I got an iPod.
I went ‘out west’ for the third time in my life.
I visited Vancouver for the first time in my life.
I dipped my feet in the Pacific ocean.
I went to my first high school dance.
I went to Niagara Falls on a (geography class) field trip with some really great people and got in trouble with the teachers because we brought too much sugary pop and chips for our own good and all had sugar rushes at midnight.
I had the time of my life in Dinner Theatre.
I discovered a secret passageway in my school’s proproom hidden behind shelves.
I invented the word ‘AWESOMAZING’.
I’ve made a zillion more people laugh.
I joined my city’s youth council.
I met the mayor.
I discovered Twilight a few weeks after the above video was filmed.
I’ve come to terms with myself. (I am not so ashamed of who I am anymore. Because I am awesomazing.)
I spent a night in a haunted hotel.
I contacted a ghost. (One of my BFF’s birthday party. Her place was haunted so we pretended to be like TAPS.)
I sang ‘Tomorrow’ (from Annie) at the top of my lungs in the middle of a forest while cleaning an outhouse.
I sang ‘Tomorrow’ (from Annie) at the top of my lungs in the middle of a forest with some of my very best friends.
I have learned that everything has flaws but that doesn’t mean it isn’t beautiful and perfect by all means.
My kitten turned three years old.
I discovered that I truly would prefer world peace over all the money in the world anyday.
I have done way more than I ever thought I would and today it has occured to me that the past two years of my life have been worth every second, and I wouldn’t change anything at all.
I really truly wouldn’t.